By / bintoromover
Is It Normal To Have Disagreements Early In A Relationship
So, do yourself a favor. If you notice something moving away a bit – maybe your partner is in control or you`re still arguing – don`t look away. “Everyone is usually at the beginning of a relationship about their best behavior,” California relationship expert Dr. Alisa Ruby Bash, PsyD, LMFT tells Bustle. “Whatever red flags or differences appear early, remember that they are only getting worse. Whatever behaviors you have a problem with, try to imagine that they are augmented on the other line and ask if you can live with them. “You shouldn`t really argue about how to choose to spend your time together. Yes, you may not always be on the same side. But if you`re already struggling to compromise on what you both want to do as a couple, it`s hard to see how your relationship can work in the long run. For example, if you`re extroverted and introverted or like to walk and not even go out, such differences can lead you to spend too much time separately, perhaps to the point where you don`t see each other often enough. It can also be frustrating if these things are important to you and not to your partner or vice versa. But then again, it`s about focusing on what`s important to you. While a problem may never go away, that doesn`t necessarily mean it has to ruin your relationship.
During the previous parts of your relationship, you will want to get to know each other better. But how can you expect him to know you if he doesn`t listen to you? It`s a big red flag in the relationship, showing how little he thinks of you and how disinterested he is in what makes your personality. I think that`s not always a bad thing. I firmly believe (even though I sometimes need a memory) that if you take enough care of a person and your relationship, you should be passionate about them, both in amazing times and in difficult times. When I hear people say that they have been together for years and that they never argue, I always shudder internally; I think they really say that they are so selfless and incompetent with each other that they can`t even bother to feel strong in any situation, no matter how bad it is. But instead of viewing arguments as a bad thing, experts agree that relationship conflicts can be healthy – an opportunity to learn more about your partner and how to work together as a team. Of course, it can be hard to see it that way when your blood is bubbling, your tolerance has collapsed, and you`re drowning in a sea of discouragement. The struggle may be real – but there are strategies for dealing with tension when problems arise. In truth, disagreements and fights are completely normal in a relationship. If you create a relationship between two separate individuals – with different habits, different tastes, different ideas, different values, different feelings, and different stories – problems will arise from time to time.
That is a fact. No matter how relaxed or laid-back both people are, there will always be cases where you disagree. If he is inconsistent with you from the beginning, it is very likely that things will stay that way. And consistency will always be very important in any type of relationship – especially in a romantic relationship. You can`t find stability in your relationship if there`s no consistency. The occasional argument is actually a good thing, says Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D., a psychologist and licensed clinical author. “When couples argue, it means they`re taking care of the relationship,” she says. “When the fight disappears completely, sometimes one or both are gone.” Not fighting with your partner may indicate another problem – maybe you`re tired of sharing your true feelings, or you don`t trust your partner to manage your feelings. .